On the Ball

It's time to get that "birthing ball" out again.  OK, so some of you refer to it as and "exercise ball".  I, however have most likely not touched or used this piece of equipment since my last child was brought into this world (he is now six).  Oh, I am sure there was an moment or two that I spent on it when I decided to start some crazy exercise regimen.  And then thought better of it...five minutes later.

Sometimes, I can be so ambitious, I scare myself.  I would think nothing of tearing apart of room to either paint or rearrange.  Or taking some tools to hack away at some piece of furniture to manipulate it in to something I dreamed up.  However, ask me to commit to anything that would benefit only myself?  That is a hard sell.  Not just me, but many of you, as well.  I am thinking that now is a good time to change this.

There is this funny balance to having RA.  Move too much (if and when you can) and you pay for it.  Move too little...and you pay for it just the same.  I have been in this limbo for a while where I really cannot exercise, for various reasons.  This week, I was given the go-ahead to start some aerobic activity.  Three minutes per day.  And I am to add a minute each week after as tolerated.  Oh, yeah [I thought]...this, I can do!  

Not so fast there mama!  And it gets better.

You see.  Not only are women blessed to be reminded each and every month for a predetermined sentence period (no pun intended!) that they are the stronger gender; able to endure great hormonal shifts (i.e. well handled mood swings!), severe cramping, inconvenience (that like no man has ever known or would be able to handle!).Women are also blessed to endure...childbirth!  Our bodies, after some time (and sometimes, bigger babies)...notsomuch.  Things literally can and will start to...fall out?  I won that lottery.

Long story short, until I get this taken care of, no aerobic activity for me.  In fact, standing for too long to do practically anything, reminds me of this.  Along with laughing, coughing or sneezing while standing.

I will not be defeated.  Get out the birthing ball!!  Nothing can fall out if I am sitting down!  I hope.

Back on the ball again. It is time to start getting those core muscles in shape and try to rebuild and build-up some of those muscles that steroids have really started to take their tole on.  I have to get myself a bit stronger before my "reconstructive" surgery (some women get tummy tucks or boob jobs when they hit 40...me?  Well, won't this be fun!  It will be a different kind of Lift & Tuck/High & Tight!).  If a simple cold can take me down for a month,I can't imagine that surgery will have a better effect on me.

And it gets even better.  I am going to work some resistance bands.  This should be fun.  I have very little strength in my arms and hands.  I imagine this not going very well.  If you run into me in public and notice any red welts, know it didn't go very well!  Maybe, I could video tape this and become a YouTube sensation.  "Girl on Birthing Ball Loses Balance and Falls Off While Getting Slapped With Resistance Bands (that most likely snapped due to their old age)".  I can totally see it now.  Except, there will be NO video.  Ever.  Period.

So, here we are again folks.  Another promise to myself.  This could turn out to be the most catastrophic promise I have made to date.  Three minutes a day on the birthing ball...with resistance bands (with limited balance and strength on my part).  This should be so damn good.

Perhaps I should change back to drinking lots of water in a day....

Misconceptions

Good beautiful sunny Saturday morning! What a week this has been. Last week, I would have never imagined I'd be doing this, blog thing. But here I am. Post # 3. I am not certain how often I will post. I am also uncertain about how often I will post my weight. I am thinking once a week. I do however suffer from a bit of OCD and will most likely weigh myself every day once I get rolling. Get rolling is what I intend to work on and solidify this weekend and coming week.

What I think I'd like to address today is the perception that overweight people are lazy and sit around for the most part eating. To those ill informed I say this, follow me around for a day. I am quite positive you will change your mind. We do not all frequent fast food chains, eat whole bags of chips or cookies in a sitting. We do not eat perfectly either. You'd be surprised to find out how often I actually eat, most days (once) and surprised once more when you see how quickly and with how little I find myself full. We are guilty of neglect, to our bodies and our spirits. We fail to nourish our bodies in the way they were meant to be nourished. And often, we give so much of ourselves without thinking twice about when the last time it was that we actually stopped to take care of ourselves.

In my case, I am a wife, mommy, sister, granddaughter, friend and child care provider and so much more. I volunteer my time at our local fire hall as VP for the Ladies Auxiliary. My house is constantly full and the door opens and closes many times in a day. I do not have much time, at all, for myself. I love my life. I love what I have made of it. I am just not sure that I love what has become of me.

Me. I am fun, loving, loyal and caring, sometimes, too caring. I want everyone to be happy and will bend over backwards to ensure that they are. I am determined. If I want it to happen or get done, I will make it happen. I am creative. I am passionate and emotional. I am proud to be emotional. It means that I feel. There is nothing wrong with that . It means that I am human. And until recently, I could never say, "no".

That is just part of who I am. I also have many struggles. I believe that we are never handed more than we can handle. Somebody thinks I am very strong! When things get tough, I try to think that there is someone out there dealing with much worse and I pray for them. While I am proud, at times of what I have overcome and the person I am, I struggle with the question of why. Not why me, just why. I will never understand. But I can stand, strong and determined. I will not be bitter. Life is too short and glorious for bitterness. I try to forgive but my head and heart can't forget. My struggle now will be convincing myself that I AM worth the effort, my effort. Maybe there are others who didn't or don't think so. Too bad. Because there MANY others that do. For that, I am truly blessed. And in that I will find success.

Fortunately, I have already started paving my path to success. As I said above, I have learned to say no. Now, I never said I don't feel guilty, but I am willing to bet that the guilt I carry over things like that weighs quite a bit! I'll have to shed that real quick! Saying no is a small step, but it is a start. Next I will have to really work on carving out time for some exercise.

About a month ago, I got some great advise from a amazing athlete. She told me to be sure to get at least 2 fruits and 2 veggies in each day (or maybe it was 3?). I was able to follow that for a couple weeks, and then...everybody in my house got sick and I fell off the wagon! But I think it made a huge difference. So I am going to start implementing that again. I am also going to up my daily water intake.

So, saying no without guilt, drinking more water, getting my fruits and veggies in and at least 10 minutes per day of cardio. And yoga! I LOVE yoga. I think those will be my goals for the week. What are yours????