For a long time, I danced between 275 and 278. Hoping with everything that I would NEVER see 280. Exercise was out of the question. First of all, I couldn't move. Stiff achy joints combined with 278 make things difficult. And honestly, I was, well, caught up in a catch 22 for a bit. At that time, all I had control over was what I put in my mouth. I knew and know that I am supposed to eat small, frequent snacks/meals (6 times per day). First of all, I barely ate 2x per day. I can hear the gasps of disbelief. But it is true. Fat doesn't always mean over-eater. I am also supposed to steer clear of carbs (I have PCOS). And like every mother, I was busy. And completely overwhelmed and fighting transitions we were encountering as I struggled, along with several doctors to figure out what on earth was happening to me.
The dust is starting to settle and I am beginning to find some sort of normal. I am starting to settle to, I guess. Not a depressing settle. Maybe that is the wrong expression. Especially for me. I have never settled. Could the right word, possibly, be...accept? Adapt? I don't know. But life is different now and we are all rolling with it as best as we can. What has settled over me/our home is a sense of calm. We are more in control of our time than ever before. And I find that we are terribly protective of it. It's kind of nice.
The meds I hate to take so much, have helped in more ways than one. I have to eat with them, or I have a VERY angry belly. So, I do. I am half way to my 6x per day. I saw a nutritionist and we made a plan. In October. It is now December. It is a great plan. However, I have yet to implement that great plan. Considering what November was like for us in this house, I won't beat myself up over it.
But guess what? That eating, just 3 times each day...did something. Because, the other day, at the doctor;s office...I weighed in at 250! How come there are no CAPS for 250? Steroids and all. I weigh less than that original 266.4 that inspired this blog.
I cannot wait to go to the docs one day, soon, step on that scale again and have them NOT have to move that weight block thingy past 200. They are always kind and start it out at 150...and I always laugh and thank them for the vote of confidence, even though I am sure it is part of their training to do so ;0)
For one week, I am going to once again attempt to make a small change. I am going to increase my water intake. I know...I've said it before. But it's one week. I CAN DO THIS! I just proved to myself that small changes can make for a BIG difference.