Stuffed!

Well, it's over.  The Christmas hussel and bussel has passed.  2011 is gone and we welcomed in 2012.  In between, my daughter turned 11(we still have to hold an official celebration for her).  I vowed not to let the craziness get to me this year.  I was going to choose wisely and take it easy.  Hmmmm...easier said than done.  I almost called the whole thing off.  That has never, ever happened before.  Silly mama.

Looking back, I am not sure what we could have done differently.  Certain things, like shopping were not an option until later in the month when funds were more available.  Baking, in retrospect, could have been tossed for this year seeing we didn't have an oven.  I decorated less, detailed less and was into the overall spirit less. There is simply too much to do.  Too much to remember, too much to over-think.  The decorations went up at a slower pace which only set me into more of a panic since it seemed they would be up for less time as I tend to lose patience with them shortly after the new year.  So much expectation packed in to too little time.  A sure recipe for disappointment.

What I have learned is that we need to simplify things more, purge more.  More, more, more.  To make for less, less, less.  We are not wealthy, in terms of ca$h money, but we have more than we could ever need.  It's time to share and sell.  I have always had a 2 year rule for clothing.  If it hasn't seen the light of day in 2 years, it is gone.  I love the feeling after I have cleared my closet and watch those bags being hauled out the door.  I helped hubby clean out his closet the other day.  At first (before I entered the project), he had this pile which consisted of a couple of shirts and a pair of pants.  I looked in his closet and asked him if he thought he was done.  He said, "Yes?"  Forty-five minutes and six garbage bags (for donation) later, we were done.  "How does it feel?", I ask.  He replies, "Really good.  I did have too much."  When we were going through his things, he kept trying to keep pants that were a size too big stating that he would need them when he was 60.  He was dead serious.  I reminded him that every Christmas and birthday, people come to me asking what he needs and he usually has no answer.  I suggest that maybe they would like to buy him some clothes and he could rotate the others out from now on. 

It is amazing how quickly stuff accumulates.  For us, it was when we first moved over 8 years ago.  People were very generous and our house was furnished on no time.  You kinda hoard for a while until you find your style.  And then you realize how much crap you really have.  If you have kids, multiply that times ten for each child you have.  Unbelievable!

I am a firm believer in memories, not stuff.  Don't get me wrong, I see the value in things.  I will always do my best to find the person who recognizes it's value as well when I no longer have a place or need for it. I am sentimental about many things, but if my house starts to get cluttered, I understand that I am no longer honoring those items as they were meant to be.  It's time to find a new home for them.  What good is anything packed in a box in the basement or attic?  If you love it that much, you'll find a place to display it.  If not, make a mental note and find someone who will love it more.  I get more satisfaction from sharing than hoarding.

My Gram's memory is slipping away, has been for some time.  Yes, I have her piano and a few other things she wanted me to have.  But, what really makes me smile?  When I think of her clicking her tongue, humming and dancing to polka music (she isn't even Polish.  In fact, she is very proud of her Scottish heritage).  Or how she could whip something up in the kitchen at a moments notice.  The sound of her laughter.  Or how she smells so good.  What item could ever maintain Gram's scent?  Nothing.  But when I close my eyes, it's all there...in the sweet spot of my mind.  And with every beat of my heart.

I want memories, not stuff.  I want to make memories, not clean up stuff.  I want my kids to have good memories.  I can't make as many if I am so focused on all the stuff that needs to be cleaned up.  I am far too organized of a person to say that I will just let stuff go and not be bothered by it.  No, that won't work for me.  What will work is if there is less stuff to make a mess with.  If your plastic containers fall out of the cupboard when you open it, you have too many. Share the wealth.  Somewhere, out there, someone is wishing they had more.

So there we have it.  This years resolution (one of them) is to have less stuff.  I can't yell that the shop is a mess, if there is less in there to get messed up.  What I want is for my daughter (and sons) to see that their mama has talent in other areas they never knew.  I love to create things and paint.  I would love to work on little projects with them.  I want to let them explore their talents as well.  We only have one shot at this kid thing.  I want to make the most of the time I have with them like this.

In all honesty, this is a great gift to myself.  I need this to be the best I can be.  Somebody recently called me a perfectionist.  I really am not.  I am a hard worker.  Nothing/nobody is perfect, no matter how hard we work at it, someone will always find fault.  I have learned this the hard way, and will probably learn it a few times over again in my lifetime.  It's all good. 

Welcome, 2012!  Now, has anyone heard anything good about that Neat Desk Scanner thingy?  Lol.  More stuff!